Rochey's Rant.

 Committee Meetings & Vanishing Golfers

Right, let’s address the elephant in the room… or more accurately, the empty Teams meeting with just me and Syd in it.

There I was—bang on time, camera on, notes ready, even did that awkward little pre-meeting face check—only to be greeted by… silence. Not a soul. Just me, my own reflection, and the creeping realisation that I’d essentially scheduled a virtual meeting with myself. Syd was actually in bed on the call!

Now, I can only assume the committee were all struck down simultaneously by a series of highly unfortunate (and increasingly creative) incidents:

• One reportedly “clicked the link but ended up in a different meeting about cloud infrastructure” and didn’t want to be rude by leaving.
• Another claimed their laptop “needed a quick update”… which apparently required the same time commitment as building the laptop from scratch.
• One brave soul said they were on the call, but “on mute and listening”—which is a bold strategy considering there was absolutely no one there to listen to.
• And my personal favourite: “I thought it was next week.” Of course you did. It’s always next week… until it isn’t.

So yes, excellent turnout. Strong engagement. Really productive session, if you ignore the complete lack of attendees.

And while we’re on the subject of disappearing acts—special mention to our mystery golfer who pulled off the rare “no show, no warning” at the recent society day. Not a text, not a call, not even a vague carrier pigeon. Just… gone.

Now, we’re not asking for much. A dramatic excuse would’ve sufficed. Something like:

• “Pulled a hamstring getting out of bed.”
• “Accidentally booked myself into the wrong country.”
• “Got lost on the way to the first tee and ended up starting a new life elsewhere.”

But no. Nothing. Just an empty space on the tee sheet and a bacon roll going uneaten. Frankly, that’s the real crime here.

So, a gentle reminder to all: if you’re going to miss a meeting or a golf day, at least give us something entertaining to work with. We’re a society, yes—but we’re also a group that thrives on a good story.

Until next time… I’ll be on Teams. Alone. Probably talking to myself.